Over-golded, trendy clothes, big belly.. This was my doctor today.
He suggested that my high blood pressure that came out of nowhere two days ago is because I might be bi-polar, suffering from migraine or panic disorder. He also said I might be a bit depressed or anxious. He also added that having a history of childhood abuse might effect my mind (no shit, Sherlock). Not to forget he thinks I'm anemic. Oh and let's not forget that he sent me home with blood pressure 30 units higher than it should be.
Nothing's changed, I'm just a bit poorer and yes, my head's still humming, my heart's beating too fast and NOW I'm pissed off too. I though I've had some poor doctors, but this one... The next time I'll go see a doctor is in a body bag. I've had it. No one calls me crazy until I start seeing pink elephants climbing trees.
And apprently I'm wrong about thinking what depression meds did to my sister has something to do with how they'll effect me. After all, we only share most of our genes. But no.
He just wanted to know do I like my life. I had to think a sec. I have J, a few well chosen friends, a nice place to live in, my most important people are alive and the only thing in my life I don't like is school. I, amazingly, like myself. I'm surprisingly happy being fat.
I basically told the doctor to go fuck himself. Well, no, I was polite as always. But I DID ask him why was he being so arrogant. "I'm not being arrogant, you're just being touchy." After a night of takykardia, humming in my ears and worry about my health in all, I'd like to have something else said instead of stating that I'm a mental case.
I'm not. The only thing I don't have the energy to do is school stuff. I can go out (even though my back aches), go shopping, sit on the computer, watch movies, talk with people, play Wii with people, cook, smile, laugh, cry... I am not crazy or even mentally unstable (isn't what all the really crazy people say), I just don't like school, had a tumor-like thingy in my belly (that's still hurting) and a muscle that hasn't healed properly.
It's all in me head, as Mr. Tweedy has to remind himself every now and then (in Chicken Run).
I forgot, there's one annoying, arrogant doctor I like and that's House, MD.
Tune of the moment:
Disturbed - Down With The Sickness